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December 16th, 2008
A ‘FAITHFUL’ BLOG FROM JOE
I just finished my mad hunt for a Christmas tree…
It makes me wanna go back to New England, cut my own down
and drive it back to LA. You never know how long they’ve been standing there.
A week, two weeks? They look good and healthy in the lot, then
ya get ‘em home and set it up right over the heating vent and they are brown
in a week.
I have an affection for the folks working the lots. I’m pissed that I’m paying that much for a tree, so I start right in with the “highway robbery” jokes, thinking maybe they’ll know I’m on to them and give me a break. I’m not sure if that ever works, but its good for a few laughs and makes it easier when I fork over the money. Now, you must be thinking, you cheap bastard! But its not the money, its just the idea that I’m paying almost $200 (welcome to Hollywood) for something that’s gonna be dead in 2 weeks, plus break my back getting it in the house (I ain’t paying for delivery) and then the thing better look good or I’ll be furious the whole Christmas season looking at it. (Not as mad as my wife is when she is stringing the popcorn and cranberries- she loves how it looks, hates doing it).
But all these guys at the tree lots seem pretty honest. I believe them when they give ya the whole schpiel. And I know they work hard for that dough… standing in the cold all night, luggin’ trees on their back, standing them up for you so you can see it better, listening to you trying to talk them down in price.
Maybe I’m a little biased… My dad used to sell Christmas trees, when he was a laid-off bricklayer. He’d come home after long nights with the money frozen in his hand- my mother would have to pry his hand open. And then he’d fall asleep in the tub, he was so tired. He did what he had to do with 6, 7, 8 kids. What a schmuck I am to worry about anything at all. The question to him is always, “wow, how did ya do it with 9 kids?” And his answer is and always was, “Faith.”
May your tree be green. May your ass be warm. May your faith be strong.
A Safe, Peaceful and Very Merry Christmas, from my family to yours.